Dear Lea,

My girlfriend’s a whore she cheats on me constantly but for some stupid reason I still love her. It would break my heart if we broke up. What do I do?

– Blinded By Love

 

Dear Blinded By Love:

Two words for you – GET OUT. I don’t mean to be so blunt and I’m sure your friends have told you that advice already, but I’m here to tell you again to leave and run far far away.

Achy Breaky Heart

Why do you say it would break your heart if you know what she is doing is wrong? Yes, at times love can be an overpowering emotion that you can’t explain, but it’s not love if your girlfriend is constantly cheating on you. She doesn’t love you if that is her behavior. Your girlfriend is probably only still with you because you let her get away with her actions. It’s time you stand up for yourself, no matter how much it’s going to hurt. You might feel heartbroken now but freeing yourself from this toxic behavior will only help you in the long run.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find out what it SHOULD mean to you (and your girlfriend)

I’d like to believe in love but more importantly I believe that without respect for your partner there is no love. In this situation, respect is lacking on both ends. Why are you calling your girlfriend a whore if you really love her? You wouldn’t resort to using such language if you were in a healthy relationship. On her end, she continuously violates the fact that you are in a relationship by sleeping with other people and thinks that is ok. Unless you are in a mutually understanding, open relationship, then being with other people is NOT ok. You even call it cheating so I doubt that is the situation. Respect yourself enough to know that you deserve better.

You are what you put out into the universe. If you continue to tolerate this behavior then you’re going to be stuck in your current situation. Have you confronted your girlfriend about her cheating? If you have and she still continues to do it, knowing how upset it makes you, that is a huge red flag. That is a red flag on fire. If you never require change then change will not happen. Have you tried couples counseling? Maybe an intervention involving her friends? I’m not a fan of ultimatums (if it’s resorted to that then you know the answer) but maybe that’s the only way to get through to her? If you do give your girlfriend an ultimatum to shape up or ship out and she says that she’s still going to continue cheating then there’s another reason to GET OUT!

I can understand being with someone who has a certain hold over you. Even if you know that they aren’t the right one there is something unexplainable about still being with them. I’m here to tell you from an outside perspective that you need to get out. Let your girlfriend find another person to constantly cheat on and move on. She is only taking up space in your life that is meant for someone who deserves to be there.

Sincerely,

Lea

 

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